Ok, so as you've probably noticed, I have an obession. Babies. After the birth of my good friend's little miracle, Adalyn Rae(i'm sure you've noticed all of the obnoxious facebook posts), i've been analyzing why they are so special to me. I mean, I can't get enough of them. I'm totally that girl who can't eat my food at a restaraunt because i'm awkwardly staring at your child and smiling. Possibly talking loudly about how cute they are. Probably annoying my husband far more than i'm annoying you. I apologize.
Unfortunately, you probably are all thinking this means that I have "baby fever" or that I myself am wishing for a child. While there is a sense of excitement for that season of life, it's actually much bigger than that. The truth is I am far from wanting a child of my own. So, why the obsession? I think i've figured it all out...
1. I am a born nurturer. Made to be a mother. Created with an instinct to do so. I just can't separate myself from it.
2. I have an annointing and gifting to be a "mother to many". I have gotten this spoken over my life about a million times. Not just children of my own, but to be a spiritual mother to many, many children who are in need. This drawing that I experience is all part of how God wired me so that I can be effective in my gifting.
3. Babies are a so, so holy to me. Really. When i'm looking at your child, it isn't just about how small and cute they are. They are so pure and innocent...a blank slate. I'm honestly thinking about all of the things that God could do with a life that hasn't been tainted yet. What God could do
specifically with each baby, and i'm probably praying internally for whatever that might be. It makes me excited! Especially in this generation, God has such need of them!
4. Pregnancy and birth are just crazy to me... the coolest thing under the sun. It's so common that we forget what an insane, supernatural, miracle it is! The idea of it all affirms my faith in God. It makes me in awe of His creative nature. Does anyone get what I'm saying? A freaking human grows inside of you, with it's own life, calling, and personality, then it comes out of you and lives it's life. INSANE!
So anyway, please excuse me while I ooh and ahh over your little ones! I'm only slightly crazy.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
spiritual adoption
It's funny how one act, one moment, one declaration can change your life. It's especially humorous (I don't mean humorous in a "ha ha" way, more of in a "God's ways are higher and there is nothing that we can do about it" kind of way) when you recount the thousands of tears shed and hundreds of cries lifted up to Heaven, begging for God to move... and in one Word from His throne it's finished. A year ago exactly, one of those took place...
It all started as I was approaching my college graduation. I was ready to move on from this stage of life, straight into my new one with Jonathan. However, there was a 7 month gap between those seasons in which I had no idea what I was going to do. I didn't have anywhere to live. I didn't have anyone I could turn to. I obviously hadn't obtained a full time position anywhere yet. 7 months was far too long to live on someone's couch like I was previously accustomed to doing in situations like these. I was so stuck.
Randomly enough, a woman from my church, Kim Colver, overheard my plight and offered a room in her home for me. I honestly didn't think much of it at first and just assumed that she was being nice. Besides, how awkward would it be to move in with a family that I barely even know? My mental processes told me that something else would fall into place but that this could be a possible backup plan otherwise. I honestly didn't think much of it. 2 weeks before graduation I started to become antsy. What in the world was I going to do? With the help of Jonathan, I swallowed my pride. He had grown up with the Colvers and couldn't understand why I would be apprehensive to begin with. Thus, I began on a journey with them (not only Randy and Kim, but their 6 grown children, and obviously Grandma Jan) that would change the inner workings of my heart forever. The Lord had set me up. He was about to have His way.
The acts inbetween are none of great power. There were a lot of normal activities on which this bond was created... Kim teaching me to cook. Always having family dinners. Renovating the basement. Sharing my love for coffee and pickles. Talking about the Bible with Randy (He is a Dr. in Theology). Going to the movies. Learning to not be a picky eater. Staying up late talking to Deborah about absolutely everything under the sun. Learning how to check the oil in my car. Babysitting Caroline. Carpooling to church. Laughing. Having Kim cry about all of the same things that make me cry. Getting hugs. Randy being overprotective. Grandma Jan making a specific cookie just because it's my favorite... and so many more! The process happened naturally. It wasn't anything that we ever attempted to force. What came next was nothing but an expression and an acceptance of the knitting that God had already done.
When I was first approached about a spiritual adoption ceremony, I wasn't sure how to feel. My heart wasn't used to being chosen or honored. My entire life I had felt rejected. Pushed aside. Unwanted. Abandoned. It was unfamiliar territory for me to say the least! However, I adjusted to the feeling quickly :)
It was such a wonderful, beautiful, and holy event. I was issued a new birth certificate and the entire family came to lay hands on me, pray for me, and prophecy over me. Leadership of our church also came to honor what God was doing both in the Earth and in the spirit. Perfection. Sharon Mullins declared that this would be the most intangible, tangible event of my life thus far. She couldn't have been more correct! I went on with life as usual. Nothing changed in the natural. Everything changed in my heart! That pain that followed me around... gone. That orphan spirit that I couldn't shake... gone. That bitterness towards my parents... a compassion for them was left in it's place. The Lord finally had His way!! Because of this one work that the Lord completed, I was released to be who He has called me to be all along. I can be the leader I was meant to be. I can be the wife I was meant to be. One day I can be the mother I was meant to be. It now is easy to look back and know that in those times of serious sorrow that He had a plan all along. I'm thankful that He completed the work in His way rather than that of my own. It is immensley beautiful! Thank you, Jesus!
I absolutely could not imagine my life without this wonderful family! Don't ever underestimate the power of unconditional love and acceptance, and when matched with the spirit of God, what it can do in the life of an individual who is in desperate need of it. I am no longer an orphan, but a daughter!
It all started as I was approaching my college graduation. I was ready to move on from this stage of life, straight into my new one with Jonathan. However, there was a 7 month gap between those seasons in which I had no idea what I was going to do. I didn't have anywhere to live. I didn't have anyone I could turn to. I obviously hadn't obtained a full time position anywhere yet. 7 months was far too long to live on someone's couch like I was previously accustomed to doing in situations like these. I was so stuck.
Randomly enough, a woman from my church, Kim Colver, overheard my plight and offered a room in her home for me. I honestly didn't think much of it at first and just assumed that she was being nice. Besides, how awkward would it be to move in with a family that I barely even know? My mental processes told me that something else would fall into place but that this could be a possible backup plan otherwise. I honestly didn't think much of it. 2 weeks before graduation I started to become antsy. What in the world was I going to do? With the help of Jonathan, I swallowed my pride. He had grown up with the Colvers and couldn't understand why I would be apprehensive to begin with. Thus, I began on a journey with them (not only Randy and Kim, but their 6 grown children, and obviously Grandma Jan) that would change the inner workings of my heart forever. The Lord had set me up. He was about to have His way.
The acts inbetween are none of great power. There were a lot of normal activities on which this bond was created... Kim teaching me to cook. Always having family dinners. Renovating the basement. Sharing my love for coffee and pickles. Talking about the Bible with Randy (He is a Dr. in Theology). Going to the movies. Learning to not be a picky eater. Staying up late talking to Deborah about absolutely everything under the sun. Learning how to check the oil in my car. Babysitting Caroline. Carpooling to church. Laughing. Having Kim cry about all of the same things that make me cry. Getting hugs. Randy being overprotective. Grandma Jan making a specific cookie just because it's my favorite... and so many more! The process happened naturally. It wasn't anything that we ever attempted to force. What came next was nothing but an expression and an acceptance of the knitting that God had already done.
When I was first approached about a spiritual adoption ceremony, I wasn't sure how to feel. My heart wasn't used to being chosen or honored. My entire life I had felt rejected. Pushed aside. Unwanted. Abandoned. It was unfamiliar territory for me to say the least! However, I adjusted to the feeling quickly :)
It was such a wonderful, beautiful, and holy event. I was issued a new birth certificate and the entire family came to lay hands on me, pray for me, and prophecy over me. Leadership of our church also came to honor what God was doing both in the Earth and in the spirit. Perfection. Sharon Mullins declared that this would be the most intangible, tangible event of my life thus far. She couldn't have been more correct! I went on with life as usual. Nothing changed in the natural. Everything changed in my heart! That pain that followed me around... gone. That orphan spirit that I couldn't shake... gone. That bitterness towards my parents... a compassion for them was left in it's place. The Lord finally had His way!! Because of this one work that the Lord completed, I was released to be who He has called me to be all along. I can be the leader I was meant to be. I can be the wife I was meant to be. One day I can be the mother I was meant to be. It now is easy to look back and know that in those times of serious sorrow that He had a plan all along. I'm thankful that He completed the work in His way rather than that of my own. It is immensley beautiful! Thank you, Jesus!
I absolutely could not imagine my life without this wonderful family! Don't ever underestimate the power of unconditional love and acceptance, and when matched with the spirit of God, what it can do in the life of an individual who is in desperate need of it. I am no longer an orphan, but a daughter!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)